Killing My Friend

A challenge has been presented by Dan O’Shea: Kill Dan Malmon. Any way you want, so long as he is dead by the end of your story (1,000 words or less). I needed to warm up my typing fingers this morning and this is what poured out. (Check out Dan O’Shea’s blog here for all the details.)


Everything’s Coming Up Malmon

He made it! Standing in line to spin the big wheel, wearing his lucky Curious George sniffing ether t-shirt, Dan felt invincible. His lifetime dream of hearing “Dan Malmon, come on down! You’re the next contestant on ‘The Price is Right’!” was surpassed beyond his wildest dreams. He’d have to apologize later for breaking Kate’s foot on the way out of the row.

He guessed the exact price to get on stage, winning not only the prize but an extra hundred dollars. So what if he tripped up the stairs and face planted at Drew Carey’s feet. A couple tissues stuffed up his nose and he was fine.

Then he got to play Plinko – Plinko! – and won the top prize of $50,000. Falling down the stairs and getting tested for a concussion during the commercial break was worth it.

He waited.

The other contestants spun. The first one went over. The second one got 90.

Now his turn.

Reaching as high as he could he spun hard and almost slid under the wheel. Click, click, click… 100! Damn this was his lucky day! Going to the showcase showdown and he got to spin one more time. Could this day get any better?

This time he was able to stay on his feet. Click, click, click… ANOTHER 100!

Dan started screaming and jumping then grabbed Drew and kissed him full on the lips. Odd since he wasn’t even a hugger.

Suddenly Dan’s good luck was gone. Drew shoved him away, slamming him into the big wheel which suddenly dislodged, dropped to the stage and rolled on top of Dan. Almost blacking out from the pain, Dan yelled his final words before meeting St. Peter for his own personal showcase showdown.

“Remember to have your pets spayed or neutered!”



One thought on “Killing My Friend

  1. Pingback: A Dirty Dozen – the Twelve Deaths of Dan Malmon | Going Ballistic

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